I took my road bike out for a ride today. It was my first ride in almost a year. My last ride was reduced to a few mile ride to and back from the horse farm nearby. I was heading fast into my depressive episode, and as it always happened during my depression, I finally came to the day I could not ride any more. So many things happened since then. I have moved to Maryland. I have started my part-time job at a coffee shop. I have opened a gallery which soon went into the process of a fast closure. All these things within a year. And today, I felt like taking a big, big exhale. So I decided to hop on my road bike, Sam, and go for a ride.
I rode down to a nearby manmade lake called “Little Seneca Lake”. It was a clear sunny day, and the clouds over the lake was breathtaking. I’ve seen many beautiful sceneries, but lately, I have come to realize that the scenery right in front of my eyes in each moment is the most beautiful scene I’ve ever beheld. At certain point in your life time, you finally reach the place where everything fits so perfectly together despite the flaws and missing elements. It’s a secret place that says “Welcome home” wherever you go. And the mysterious thing is: the place follows you wherever you are.
And so, I wasn’t surprised to see the giant figure in the sky with his arms wide open ready to embrace me saying, “Welcome home!”
I stopped my bike and stared at the clouds in the shape of a giant man. It almost looked like the giant man was running to me, as if he couldn’t wait to have me in his big arms. My heart was telling him about all the places I’ve been, all the people I’ve met, and all the things I’ve done. ‘But now I’m here.’ I was saying, ‘I’m here, in my bike jersey, with long black pony tail, still riding my bike. I am still that same girl and here I am.’
So many things inspire me, but nothing moves me like the allure of the road. It always leads you somewhere. You are bound to run into houses, trees, horses, cows, small country stores, and little cafes.
The road tells you so many stories if only you are willing to listen. Stories are lying all over on the side of the road, ready to be discovered, ready to be heard. I never failed to discover a story every time I went out for a ride. I am always so hungry for more stories…
Today, I’ve heard it.
I could hear the story again.
I took a big inhale.
To breathe life in.
To let the story in…