Misty Morning

I can see the sun hidden behind the thick morning mist still making its usual rounds. Before I know it, the mist gives way to the persistent sun and the full daylight is before me. Clear sky, clear mind, clear visions, and clear answers... I find myself silently sending my wish list to God.

Whenever the morning is misty and thick woods in my backyard start to resemble the foggy morning somewhere in English country, I always think about the last scene from the movie Pride and Prejudice. Ms. Elizabeth lets out her cold breath, hugging her arms as if to protect herself from the pain of love lost forever (so she thought), her lost gaze penetrates through the thick misty air like a desperate prayer. Then, Mr Darcy suddenly appears breaking through the mysterious dawn, revealing his full mysteries…

The bright future walking right into your life…

Some feminists would do their best to argue my point, but sometimes, I just want to be a romantist.

With the stormy sea of emotions that had been governing my senses for the last few weeks behind me, I finally wake up to my real senses. Life will resume once again, even though I have a lot of catching up to do now. There’s so much to clean up after a turbulent storm has ripped apart my stability.

But, today, I am counting my blessings.

I think I read at least two articles during the last few weeks about untimely lives lost to drugs and suicide in the newspaper: son of David Feherty who died from drug overdose and Chester Bennington from Linkin Park who struggled with addiction and ended his life in suicide. Both died on their birthdays. These tragic stories tell me how dangerous it is to be alive. It is tough to stay alive. It’s a hard job to survive this life on earth.

But, today, I count my blessings.

After all, I am still alive having overcome yet another mental and emotional battle that occur so many countless times in my life. As I prepare my daughter’s birthday party which will take place this afternoon at my quiet homestead in the peaceful country, I know I will be celebrating not only her life, but my own as well. I am committed to this life more than ever, I still sustain and fight on despite this lonely battle going on inside.

Fog is slowly lifting, promising a perfect sunny day to have a perfect backyard birthday party. I let out my cold breath through the chilly misty morning air, hugging my arms to embrace myself. My bright future is in heaven waiting for me to finish this misty walk of this human journey on earth. And I have the best companion, My Jesus, right here doing the walk for me, carrying me in his mighty arms. I cannot finish this walk alone, but through Him, all things are possible, even when a single step forward seems most impossible.

I count my blessings today for my life, for my daughter’s life, and for the health and happiness of my family and my friends. But the greatest blessing of all is to have my Jesus in His full revelation right here, right now. And at this very moment, heaven is not just my bright future. Party balloons will be up and floating, one by one my family and friends will arrive. Kids will play in the pool-whether permitting!- and meat and vegetables will be grilled over the fire. It will be a day of celebration for these fragile human lives here on earth. And there is no other place on earth I’d rather be today.

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