I am sitting at my favorite hangout place enjoying the silence and peace. These two elements are not easily available to me these days. As I sit mindlessly in the glorious sunlight, I heard a verse I read this morning in the gentle morning breeze.
“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give it to you. Do not let your hearts be troubled or afraid.”
I’ve experience so much peace in this place. One year lived here flew by so fast. If I could hold the time still and if God asks me what type of life in heaven I would prefer when I face him after my physical death, then I will choose this life. I would answer, the blessed life that you had given me in that country side, yes, God, I would very much love to re-live those days once again. But I know the life He has prepared for me is going to be way better than this. I know it will be beyond the grasp of my imagination.
I am not trying to limit myself, but I do truly love my life in this place. It gives me a bitter-sweet feeling to leave this life behind for almost two month. It’s D-31 before my journey to Seoul. I should be overjoyed and excited beyond measure but this trip came out of blue. This was not expected. It was unplanned. And I am afraid because I would not have had the courage to chose to leave at this time had the power to make such a big decision been entirely up to me.
Nonetheless, I try my best to focus on the joys that are coming ahead. God did answer my tearful prayer when I cried in His presence at the recent Adoration because I missed my sister in Korea. It’s amazing when you think about how gentle and detail God’s loving care can be.
When I come back from Korea, many things will be different here. The life as I know it will be no more. We will be going through the deepest summer by the time I return from my country, the toughest year for me to handle due to my mental condition, and who knows what type of trouble I will be working through by then.
Nonetheless, my peace will not be shattered wherever I end up because this divine peace cannot be governed by the things of the world. This is the very peace that Jesus has promised before He returned to His Father. This is the peace that has power to get us believers through the persecution of the end times. With this invincible weapon in my heart and soul, my heart shall not know fear. My heart shall not be troubled.